Kitchen Tiles and Bathroom Cleaners
by ellamo
Summary: ... what I did I did for me // and also you to some degree...


For the second time in her life, Cameron enters into a marriage that she knows will never last.

House wears jeans and a t-shirt. Cameron wears a pretty blue sundress. He whispers into her ear that she's beautiful and then they start to repeat after the minister.

Cameron doesn't cry. She doesn't even come close. Wilson is there, as a witness, with his girlfriend. There is no reception; just a hug for him and a kiss on the cheek for her as they leave the small church. The wedding was her concession to him. She'd have been just as happy at a justice of the peace.

He doesn't say much on the drive home. She notices an envelope taped to her mirror when she goes into the bathroom to wash the makeup from her face. She snatches it down and opens it; two plane tickets to London.

Her hand trembles. She hears him walk up behind her and turns around. "What is this?"

"Honeymoon." He shrugs, looking down at his feet. His shirt is unbuttoned and untucked.

She honestly can't imagine them traveling together. Can't imagine him and her and a shared life. She crosses the bathroom and leans up on her tip-toes. She presses a kiss to his cheek and smiles. "Did you clear it with Cuddy?"

"Yep." Once he decides that she isn't about to rip the tickets up, he stands a little straighter. "You better back something skimpy, too. I want to show off the new Mrs. House."

"I'm keeping my last name," she reminds him, for the hundredth time.

*

Chase calls her at four in the morning. He's heard the news, and celebrated on their behalf with copious amounts of alcohol.

"Where are you going?" House says in sleep-roughened voice. His arm is around her naked waist, fingers tightening reflexively, possessively.

"I'm going to pick him up," she says, bracing herself for the fight.

House just rolls over and goes back to sleep.

*

"Allison!" Chase says. He can't even sit up straight anymore. She pockets the keys that the bartender hands her and asks how much he owes. She pays his tab and smiles, unable to help herself, when he nuzzles her hair.

"You are so drunk." She laughs, guiding him into her passenger seat. "You aren't feeling sick, are you?"

"Not in the least," he beams at her. "Means I need more."

"No, just means you're too numb to feel anything."

"'s what I wanted," he points out and the lightness in him evaporates in an instant. "I can't believe you really did it."

"What?" She says, getting into the driver's seat and starting the car.

"Married him! He's a prick!"

"Chase-"

"Don't, don't try, just. Allison, we-"

"There is no we."

"You _married_ him."

"I love him," she says.

"You love me." When she looks over at him, he is genuinely pouting, hand in his hand and eyes closed. He whispers, "You love me."

"I do." She says, reaching over and covering his hand with hers. "But I love him, and I married him."

"You wouldn't marry me. You don't love me."

"I left my husband on our wedding night to come see you because you needed me."

Chase opens his eyes. "Is he mad? Did you have a fight about it?"

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Cameron presses her foot against the gas pedal harder, annoyed. "You're both like children sometimes. No, we didn't have fight. He's passed out, he probably didn't even hear me say where I was going."

"Wore him out, huh?" Chase says bitterly. "Your mum called me last week. She's worried about you. Did you even tell her that you were getting married? That you're living with him?"

"Shut up!" Cameron shouts. It's enough for Chase to fall silent mid-rant. "Just don't say another word until we get h- until we're at your place."

*

It's almost five when she climbs back into bed. House is laying there with his eyes open. "What, you didn't stay for a drink with him?"

"Shut up," she mumbles, but reaches out for him. He lets her rest her head on his shoulder and eventually she feels an arm around her back. "Of course I didn't."

House isn't going to yell at her. He's not going to kick or scream or make a scene.

This is all the fruits of his labor. The victory, though maybe not quite as sweet as he'd been hoping for. He plotted and he schemed and he won. She's not sure if he regrets it or not, but she's not going to let him change his mind now.

*

She's violently ill the next morning. She's on her hands and knees in his bathroom throwing up until she feels dizzy. She hears him on the phone with Cuddy: Cameron won't be in today. The plane tickets for Paris are marked with tomorrow's date. She won't have to wipe a bloodied nose or set a broken finger for at least two weeks. It sounds like heaven, or it will when her stomach stops rolling.

House makes her tea and toast and wipes her face with a cool, damp bath cloth. "Okay?" He asks, brushing her hair back from her forehead.

"No," She moans and rolls over, face pressing into the pillow. "Kill me now."

"You've got me confused with someone, I think the Kevorkian home is two doors down." He says, smoothing her hair down her shoulders and brushing it with his fingertips. "Is there anything else you need before I leave?"

"My life back," she whispers. He stands up and leaves without saying anything else.

*

She calls Foreman that night and tells him everything. He's not exactly her ideal confidante but she needs the voice of someone sane to tell her that she's doing the best thing. Or at least not the absolute worst thing.

"Wow," Foreman says, sitting back in the booth with a look of genuine shock on his face. "Oh, man, you are in some deep shit."

"Look, just, you can't say anything, all right? I mean, ever. This is death bed kind of stuff."

"So you're just gonna... have it? And then leave?"

Cameron rubs at her forehead with her hand. "I don't know. I don't know what I'm going to do. That's, that was his idea, yeah. He wants it. I don't know why, but he really wants it."

"But it isn't his?"

She shakes her head.

"And Chase...?"

"Doesn't know."

"Would he want it?"

"Probably. But-" She sighs. "I can't give him everything he wants. I love him, I just. I can't be... that. I can't do the picket fence and 2.5 kids with him. He would want that, if he knew."

"So this deal, with House?"

"He gets the baby. I get options. After I have it, I can leave if I want to."

It sounds so cold, so cruel, saying it out loud.

"Do you think you'll want to?" Foreman asks.

"I don't _know._" She is embarrassed to feels tears in her eyes.

"Do you know how insane this all sounds?"

She hides her eyes from him, looking down at the table. "I know. Believe me, I know. But it's House."

"So you're still in love with him." Foreman sort of says, sort of asks.

*

The marriage won't last. The marriage can't last.

He's a bitter old man and she's worked too hard to let this be her life.

But sometimes he makes her smile when she isn't expecting it and he left a baby book out on the living room table for her to glance over, knowing she wouldn't be able to resist and life with him isn't at all what she thought it would be.

It won't last forever. But maybe it'll last just long enough.


End file.
